10 weeks

So, I'm in the middle of my tenth week. I know it's been a while, but this nausea has really taken over my life! I do not remember EVER feeling this sick. What in the world is going on! I seriously feel like all I do is try to convince myself that i want to eat, then eat, and then feel sick seconds later. It's annoying. I got really sick last week on the my husband's day off (which can be looked at as a huge blessing, or a really huge let down. He spent most of his day off cleaning up my throw up).
On the other hand, I really can't stop thinking about my sweet little baby that is growing inside of me right now. I get way excited to think about whether it is a girl or a boy. I want to know so bad!! I really am wishing I would have scheduled my OB appointment for sooner. I did this last time too, I scheduled it for later just to cut down on visits. They do get kind of old after a while. I wish I hadn't though because I am really anxious to hear this baby's heartbeat and make sure that things are going well. I did have a Priesthood blessing the other day though where I was told that this baby is growing and healthy, so that was a relief. I don't know what I would do without the Priesthood. It brings me so much comfort with so many things in my life.
So yeah, my back pain is back and times 10. My chest pain continues, and actually feels a lot more like heartburn than before, but that's to be expected. I wish I knew what was wrong with my stomach and had something to remedy the problem. I took the pills that Dr. Miles gave me last Sunday and I can't stop wondering if that is what made me so sick on Monday. No logical explanation, just a feeling, but I'm learning to trust my feelings more and more.
I have been craving salad. Yep, regular old green salad with all the toppings. And I have to have RANCH DRESSING!! I about died the other night when I realized we were out. Had it not been Sunday, I would have sent Nate out to get me some. But I guess it's better that than the Fries and Fry sauce I craved with most of my other pregnancies. Or the caramel popcorn, or the raisinettes. Could be worse. I have been eating a LOT of Spearimint Life Savers as well. They seem to be quite the Life Savers in all of my nausea situations. It's been good. That and gum. I finally felt okay today and I think it was because I ate breakfast this morning first thing. I thought I was going to hurl it up the whole time, and for about an hour afterward, but I do think it helped me with the next few hours. Who knows. I really just feel like I can't eat enough, but that I hate eating. It's odd.
Nate has been my Knight in Shining Armor lately. He's really been picking up a lot of the slack and there's been a LOT! He has been really affectionate and very sweet with me. I love that. He is WAY helpful with the kids too, and that right now, is PRICELESS!!!
Well, that's all my ramblings for now. I'm kinda wanting a salad now after talking about it. I will try not to take so long to post. Not that anyone is reading this, but I really want to document it. Oh, I forgot to mention that I am not fitting in one of my pants anymore. Kind of soon in my opinion, but I'm not ready to get out the maternity, so I think the hairthing around the button is going to have to do for now :) Time to buy some new maternity clothes too I think. I have none left it seems like.
Okay, the end.

Week 7 ish

This pregnancy is crazy! I think I hit an all-time low (for this pregnancy) with the nausea! I felt AWFUL today! I think it was mostly because I didn't eat last night. If I eat late at night (which I know is terrible for my metabolism, but I do what I gotta do) I feel better in the morning. I felt terrible this morning, and then it just got worse! To make it worse we didn't have any food in the house. I was starving and sick at the same time and I knew that if I just ate something I would feel better. So I finally just dragged my 5 kids down to the store and bought some groceries! It was good to finally eat something but I was still way sick and tired! Luckily I had a few little unexpected blessings and the afternoon flew by. But anyway. I hope that was the last day like that for a while.
I need to get myself out of this emotional low! I feel SO UNMOTIVATED to do ANYTHING! I have let my dishes go for 2 days again (the no dishwasher thing is not helping), and the laundry too..... I just keep trying to get myself to do it and it just doesn't happen. I hate it! I feel bad because Nate has been sick too so we've both just been dead beat parents sitting around doing nothing. This is a stage that I am always aware of and I know it will go away, but UGH!!! I can't believe i still have like 32 more weeks of this! I'm excited for a baby though....funny how I can muster up some excitement when I feel so crappy :) Sweet little spirits can do miracles!
So, I keep stressing about this talk I have to give on Sunday. I am not sure what to do with all the butterflies....I wish they could just tell me the day before because I just stress about it the whole time before. I'm excited to give a talk again though, it's been a while.
I'm really hoping we can get Nate's raise soon and be able to get into a house. It really worries me that we will not be able to get into a house before the baby comes. I hate the thought of being stuck in this basement with a new baby again. I am grateful to have a place to live, but it's a tough one for me to not stress about. Obviously STRESS is a big factor for me when I"m pregnant. I need to stop thinking.
I have been having really strange dreams lately.....gotta love that. They're not my favorite. I won't go into them.
I can't wait to tell the girls about this baby. I know they will be so excited. It's easier for them if they don't have to anticipate it for 9 months though. We'll tell them soon. We have to wait until we want everyone else to know too since they're not as good at keeping secrets yet :)
I remembered another reason I like to wait. I hate the thought of people thinking that i get pregnant for attention or to be babied ya know. I know some have thought that (at least with baby number 2 it was mentioned) so I hate to let people think that ever again. I don't do it for attention. I don't like attention. I like to have babies. I do like the sweet spirit that is there when a baby is brought into the world. I do think that that one special moment is what pulls me through each pregnancy. Pretty crazy that it would! But I love it! So anyway. That's my ramblings for today.